so i've realized in all my rantings about how miserable i feel/life is/etc, i've depressed quite a few people. to the point even that a friend i have not spoken to in years im-ed me and asked how i was doing (which i definitely appreciated dave). and it's made me step back and take a look at how things really are, which, honestly, aren't that bad. yeah, job thing isn't going quite as well as i would like. but then i can't really honestly expect to get the best jobs when i really haven't been out here all that long and i haven't paid my dues. but that time will come.

take for example this past week. i was working (hence the hiatus on writing) on a small super low budget short about a DJ. the script was ok, the food was awful but i met some really nice people who i think might help me in the long run. and i gained more experience and something else to put on my resume. and that might just make it worth it in the end.

so here begins the positive outlook on things. i will work for free/low pay without complaining too much because it will help me. i will use my free time to read and get in shape and keep in touch with people. i will enjoy LA for all that it has to offer since i'm going to be here for awhile. i have good friends, a great boyfriend, and a wonderful supportive family who hasn't told me to get a "real" job yet. what more can you really ask for :)

thanks everyone. thanks for reading, thanks for the support. and i promise to be there when you need me too. all you have to do is ask.